My June Resolutions

I didn't keep my New Year's Resolutions at all, and I've been thinking lately about some things that I'd like to do. Therefore, I am making my June Resolutions list. I would start immediately, but I have to mentally prepare myself and also I have my vacation in a week - don't want to start doing anything different before a vacation! Tomorrow I am attending the Get Motivated! conference in Charleston, and this has also prompted me to think about some changes I'd like to make...and then I will Get Motivated! to accomplish them. I think I will get more out of the conference if I have some goals in mind.

1. Positive Thinking
Definitely not one of my better qualities, but I tend to worry way too much. A co-worker gave me an excellent piece of advice when I was talking to her the other day about my paranoia of Lauren traveling from Louisville to St. Louis. She told me to stop speaking negatively about it, and when it worried me, to just pray about it. I have been doing this ever since she gave me this advice, and I feel much more at peace. I still worry about Lauren, but no longer do I feel this overwhelming sense of fear because rather than speaking about negative things that *could* happen, I am focused on her getting there safely and having a great time with her grandparents; this likewise will help me to relax and enjoy my vacation. I think that this little exercise has been good for me, and now when I start to have a negative thought or worry, I do my best to turn it into a positive and to pray about it.

2. Be healthier
I am redefining this. In my New Year's Resolution, I resolved to eat healthier and exercise. Well, neither has consistently happened. I tend to try things in the extreme - rather than introducing healthier habits, I tried to just cut out all the food I thought was *bad* for me and to exercise every day. Obviously, I burnt out on this very quickly and it was hard to get back on track. Therefore, I want to just be healthier in general. I do have a few pounds I'd like to shed, but rather than focus on that, I'm going to focus on making better food choices and to exercise a few times a week. I don't need to Wii Fit every day. I am going to aim to use it 3 times a week, and to do little things daily that will help me. For example, I will start parking further away from the door at work so that I get extra steps in. Every little bit makes a difference, and in the articles I've received at work, that was one piece of advice for people who claimed not to have the time to exercise. Also, I'm going to try to eat healthier by making better decisions. I'm not going to deprive myself of sweets because I enjoy them. I've already done well by cutting out soda - for the most part. I think I will feel better about myself if I make wiser choices rather than trying to be extreme and then feeling bad when I fall off the wagon.

3. Time Management
I don't feel like my time management is awful, but it could be better. Ideally, I would love to go to bed at 10pm and get up at like, 5:30am. I require more sleep than this, but if I can just start doing it I might get used to it! The entire time that Lauren is up and I'm home with her, my attention is devoted to her. Every once in a while I can get some housework done while she's up, with either her helping me or doing it when Troy is home and he is watching her. I have a hard time taking time just for myself though. When she goes to bed, I like to spend time with Troy since it's much less hectic than while Lauren is up. If I could get up earlier, I could do my workout a few times a week and get some housework done other times. Or maybe I could just get up and watch the news, and catch up on all my issues of Foreign Affairs that are piling up because I don't have the time to look through them. One of the seminars tomorrow is on time management, and I hope to learn a lot from this!

4. Writing / Reading
I know that to aspire to do this daily is not a realistic goal, but I would like to devote some time to just writing freely and reading some of the "nerdy" things that interest me. This goes along with time management. If I can get up early and make better use of my time, I will be able to fit this in.

5. Finances
Blah. I hate money. No, I really don't - I love money, but it stresses me out. I am going to get a grip on my finances. I am going to stop carrying my credit card altogether, and if I want to purchase something, I will only allow myself to do so if I have the money in my checking account. Also, my goal is to pay off my credit card in its entirety by the end of the summer. Honestly, this is totally do-able. My balance isn't so high that I'm setting an unrealistic goal. I just need to stop using it and start paying it off. Sounds simple, yet it is something that I struggle with! And as it goes with my pledge to "be healthier", I have learned from experience that it doesn't work for me to just completely cut myself off. What happens is I will do good for a long time not buying anything, and then I go on a binge. I think if I don't deprive myself - and by myself, I mean just random little things for me or Lauren - but stick to only getting something if I have the money in my account, I will do better at this. Plus, another bonus could be that if I am able to get my card paid off and keep a balance off of it, then I can start putting more money towards my student loan and also figure out what I would be able to afford if I get a new car! I may be reviewing my Suze Orman book "Women and Money"!

I think this about sums up what I hope to accomplish the rest of the year, and I hope for these to become permanent lifestyle changes. I need to hold myself accountable, but not have standards so high that I set myself up for failure, and then feel bad about failing. Additionally, I want to continue doing the things I feel are good - such as being a great mom to Lauren, teaching her new things, spending quality time with her; continuing to have a healthy attitude towards work and to enjoy my job, especially in these horrible economic times; to remain a loyal friend and to keep in touch with my friends that aren't here.

If I ever get off of my path, I will return back to this list. And here is the main reason for me to achieve success with my five resolutions / lifestyle goals:

TO SET A GREAT EXAMPLE FOR LAUREN. I want her to look up to me and to be proud of me. I want her to grow up to be a strong, independent, intelligent and responsible woman. I don't want her to have the same struggles I have with body image, finances, or falling behind on my goals. I want her to be a better person than I am today, and to do that, I need to become a better person than I am today. So, for Lauren, I will accomplish my goals.